Feel free

“You have tremendous freedom living here. There’s no yard person or housekeeping person to call if you go on a trip. If something needs to be fixed, you just put in your order and it gets done. You can sell your home and still have all those comforts without all the worries.”

It’s understandable that you’ll need time to consider all the issues we’ve touched on here. The only thing we’d caution against is the natural temptation to let the whole decision-making process slide into neutral. That eases the stress in the short term but could leave you scrambling to make tough choices under far more pressure somewhere down the road.

It’s not one decision, it’s many

In this case the simplest advice may also be the best: Take that big, life-changing decision and break it down into more manageable parts. Have a look at your existing support systems, from home services to family and friends. Think about what’s working and what may have to change. Look at your current health and fitness, and your ability to get around—whether across town or just down the basement stairs. And try your best to think about the longer term.

Those what if conversations don’t have to be about eliminating possibilities. Growing older is about creating and exploring new possibilities—in the life you want to lead, in the people around you, and in yourself. If you feel it’s taking a lot of your energy and resources just to maintain the status quo, maybe you need to start thinking more seriously about what you want your possibilities to be.

Who can you talk to?

• your spouse or partner
• your family
• your friends
• your minister, priest or rabbi
• your doctor or other care providers
• community and social organizations
• local senior communities—and especially their residents

Isn’t it too early to be thinking about all this?

It’s natural to put off dealing with major decisions about your future living arrangements—especially if everything seems to be going fine at the moment. If it ain’t broke, why fix it?

But the fact is, thinking through these issues now—and ideally coming to some basic conclusions—has enormous value, even if you don’t act on your conclusions right away. On the other hand, if you give in to the natural temptation to slide these questions onto the back burner, you risk having to make important decisions down the road under acute pressure—and that’s never good.

With no plan in place, you may discover that your preferred living option is no longer available when you need it, or has new eligibility requirements that you weren’t aware of, or is not within your financial means. Of course it may be that none of these worst-case scenarios will arise—there’s no point in being alarmist, either. But unless you do some investigating now and start putting an initial strategy in place, you’re leaving yourself vulnerable to potential stress and disappointment later.

Planning ahead gives you more control over your future. You gain the peace of mind that comes with knowing you’ve done your homework, talked to the people whose opinions you trust, and have a clear sense of what your options are.

How to Find Out More

There are no instant answers to any of these questions. The critical first step is to get more information—if only to figure out what else you need to ask and who may have the best answers.

We hope the web links found in this section are a good start. And if you or someone in your family wants to get in touch with us at the be.group, we’ll be happy to share what we’ve learned from helping countless people face exactly the same kinds of questions:

Call us at (818) 247-0420, or click here to contact us.